Staying on track
Making a deadline is easy...except when it's to myself
I am really good at external deadlines.
It was one of the things I excelled in at school. If there was a due date, I knew I needed to finish it and have the assignment turned in.
At work, if I’m assigned something, I take to it immediately and complete my responsibilities because I know other people are waiting for me.
Taking a writing class is the often only way I’ll produce a new piece of fiction because it would be embarrassing if I showed up with nothing.
I have automatic bill pay set up so I never miss those deadlines either.
I can keep a deadline if it is externally imposed…but continuing a project and keeping a deadline for myself…impossible.
If I set a goal for myself (like sending out a weekly newsletter), something often happens that makes me miss the deadline or stop the project.
Maybe I’m busy with a work project, maybe I’m taking a class and am not home, maybe I’m going out of town…whatever it is, I am great at negotiating my own deadlines with myself.
This is true in many circumstances: making appointments, keeping a workout schedule, eating lunch… I’ll negotiate out of a deadline or task that I have to do and put it off until later (of course, at that point, lunch becomes dinner).
Previously, when this happened, I have been disappointed in myself and felt like I’d let people down—even if it was just my deadline. If I missed the deadline, I felt like it was done. Like I couldn’t pick something up and start it again.
Take Peloton, for example. It told me that I missed a workout by one day and wouldn’t track it on the program.
So, I quit the program. I did the workout one day late, even if it didn’t “count” toward their results. I restarted the program so I could track it for myself, recognizing that the only person I was accountable to was me—not even Jess Sims (who is great) as she reminds me “you can do it, Peloton” every class.
I had the same feeling this week about this newsletter. My goal for sending out this newsletter is Wednesdays—a midweek lift. But this week, Wednesday came and went and I forgot to write the newsletter.
Past Melanie would have given up, saying I wasn’t consistent so by “rules” of “influencer” on the internet, my audience will be impatient with me and stop following.
Not gonna lie, I did think about that for a second—it even took me 3 attempts to figure out what I wanted to write about.
Over the last year, I’ve done a lot of work surrounding feeling overwhelmed or not knowing where to start and starting anyway. So, I told myself that’s what I would do today. Besides, this newsletter was started as a project that brought me joy, and if there’s anything that I should continue, it’s that.
Keeping up with other deadlines and goals isn’t quite as enticing (for some reason, lunch still is hard), but I am building the habit of finishing what I started. Not because I have to do it, but because I get to and I want to…and that’s all the motivation I need.
Ten Things This Week
I started reading Brené Brown’s Braving the Wilderness last night. More on this in another post, but I really like it.
In the above book, Dr. Brown mentions that her favorite poet is Dr. Maya Angelou. She’s mine too. If you haven’t heard her recite “Still I Rise” stop what you’re doing and watch this video now.
You should also listen to Dr. Rosephanye Powell’s song of the same name that she wrote because she was inspired by the poem. You can see a performance conducted by Dr. Powell here.
I love cozy mysteries. When I need something easy to watch, they are my go-to. I’m really into this Acorn show starring Lucy Lawless (yes, that Lucy Lawless). It’s a delight.
When I was watching my cozy mystery last night, I lit a cozy candle. The only place I buy candles now is Bushyl. Go there for all your cozy soap, candle, and bath salts needs.
I recently rewatched Emperor’s New Groove for my podcast. I laughed every minute. Booyah.
On that same note, I watched Meet The Robinsons. Also great, and Tom Selleck is in it.
Bake these cookies. Thank me later.
Bake Squad is back on Netflix, if you are craving watching people make insanely creative wild looking desserts.
And because the Queen announced her tour yesterday…Renaissance. Just go listen.
That’s it for today. See you all soon!
Melanie