Reflections on three years

A few states away and a world of difference

Yesterday, I celebrated three years of living in Los Angeles.

It’s hard to believe the time went that quickly. Of course, since 2020, time hasn’t meant anything—at least not in the linear sense that it did before the pandemic.

I’m no longer measuring time in school years, nor does time feel like it should. One day can be three days or three hours. January lasts four years while July comes and goes overnight. I am told the world is turning at the same rate it always has, but my experience of it is constantly changing.

I guess that’s fitting given how much my life has changed in the past 3 years. I have the same car that was perfectly packed (thanks to my mother) to carry my belongings across 6 states, but the license plate clearly says California. That identification felt like a costume in 2020—like a kid trying on adult’s clothing, clacking across the living room in oversized heels. Today, it feels right—the shoe fits.

But the license plate isn’t the only thing that’s changed in the last 3 years. My hair color, my eyes, and my freckles may remain the same, but I am a different person than the one who drove up to a golden yellow building on August 17, 2020 and unpacked her boxes alone thanks to a raging pandemic.

Here’s how:

Then: I lived in a goldenrod building with a roommate.

Now: I live in a yellow building by myself.

Then: I had one plant.

Now: I have 3 plants all still alive.

Then: I exclusively existed in stretchy pants and barely wore makeup.

Now: I have redefined my style, allowing myself to wear clothes that a less-confident version of me would have scoffed at. I do my makeup every morning, not because I feel like I need it, but because it truly makes me happy and it is a form of creative expression.

Then: I was practicing German on Duolingo.

Now: I’m studying French on Duolingo, in a French class, and via television shows.

Then: I knew my sun sign (Libra).

Now: I know my sun sign (Libra), moon sign (Capricorn), and rising sign (Sagittarius). I also have a Tarot deck.

Then: I watched movies via Discord with one of my best friends.

Now: I record a podcast about movies with that same friend.

Then: I was unemployed, unsure of my direction, and lying on the floor staring at the ceiling trying to come up with dialogue for a sitcom.

Now: I am gainfully employed in a job I really like. I have a balanced life in which my job is just one factor. I still lie on the floor trying to figure out what to write.

Then: I knew 2 people in Los Angeles.

Now: I have friends from improv, writing, choir, feminist groups, mutual connections, random parties, adjacent tables in Ireland, and old friends I have reconnected with.

Then: I spent my life in my apartment for months-on-end, lest we forget the quarantine.

Now: I am out of my apartment most nights, flitting between improv shows, dinner dates, watching comedy, and all of the other opportunities I am afforded by living in a big city.

Then: I chased people who weren’t write for me. I was so afraid of being alone, I needed to be liked.

Now: I attract who is right for me. I am never alone, and time spent by myself is healing.

Then: I thought my lack of certainty about my future was limiting. No concrete goals felt aimless, lacking ambition.

Now: I am open to the twists and turns in the path ahead. I have intentions, things I’d like to accomplish, but I am open to changing my goals based on what serves my life.

Three years ago, I never would have seen myself here. Today, I can’t imagine being anywhere different. Who knows where the next three years will lead.

To everyone who has made my LA experience what it is, thank you for being there for the ups, the downs, the isolation, and the community. You have helped me step into my strength, own who I am, and be proud of the life I have created here. Here’s to another year in the City of Angels.

Ten Things I Love About LA

1. Comedy! I tell everyone one of my favorite things about LA is that I can see top-notch comedians on a Tuesday. And I often do. This coming Tuesday, I’m seeing Jameela Jamil at Dynasty Typewriter (a great venue), and I can’t wait.

2. Music! The Hollywood Bowl is magical, and you can get in for as little as $10 (sometimes less). During my last visit, I saw a tribute to Stephen Sondheim featuring Patti Lupone, Sutton Foster, Norm Lewis, Skyler Astin, Sierra Boggess, and Brian Stokes Mitchell. I would not get that anywhere else.

3. Tacos. Whether it’s a sidewalk talk stand or a much-lauded fusion fave, the tacos here are awesome.

4. Performing. If LA is known for one thing, Hollywood could be that thing. As such, I have gotten back to my performing roots by taking improv and other classes. While it is very much a hobby for me, it is exciting to be back on stage and play.

5. Cultural neighborhoods. If I go 5 minutes in one direction, I’m in Koreatown. If I go 5 in another, I’ll hit Little Ethiopia. Scattered around are Little Armenia, Thai Town, Historic Filipino Town, an El Salvador Corridor, and a whole lot of Orthodox Jews. This doesn’t exist in Colorado Springs.

6. Food. Even just with the smattering of cultural neighborhoods listed above, there is more good food than I can ever work through in LA. Throw in some Michelin Star restaurants and top-notch chefs, it’s a darn delight.

7. Farmer’s markets. I rarely buy produce at a grocery store anymore. Farmer’s markets hare open all year here, and it is such a great way to connect to the community.

8. The weather. While this year has not been our typical endless sunshine, you can’t beat palm trees swaying in a light breeze against the bright blue sky. Even if I do miss fall.

9. Local getaways. There is so much to visit in California that is no more than a 3 hour drive. I’ve gotten to go to Santa Barbara, Ojai, San Diego, Palm Springs, and some spots in Orange County and Ventura, but there are still so many places that I would like to explore.

10. The people. I have truly made some incredible, life long friends here. There are too many to list, but without them, this place would not be what it is.

Here’s to another year.

See you next time!

—Melanie