On Overwhelm
I may have bitten off a bit too much
Historically, I like to keep myself busy. As they say, “idle time is devil’s playground”, and when I have too much idle time, my brain tends to get me in a whole lot of anxious trouble. So, I have a lot of hobbies, plan many nights to see friends, and am often reading more than one book.
My busyness reached a new level this week on Monday when I got back from Oklahoma—a wonderful time seeing my dear friend Anna before she has her first baby—and began preparing for my trip to France this upcoming Sunday.
Never one to do anything halfway, however, Monday night, I added moving to a new house 12 days after I get back from France to my to-do list. Living by myself has been a great experience, but after 2 years, I decided I missed being around people—and saving some money each month doesn’t hurt.
I thought that my search would take a few weeks, but no later than 12 hours after I posted on a LA roommate finder forum on Sunday night did I have an inbox message on Monday morning. By Monday evening, I had signed a lease and given notice to my apartment that I’d be moving at the beginning of next month.
Tuesday morning, the weight of everything on my to-do list hit:
Laundry from Oklahoma
Pack for France
Clean my kitchen
Unclog my shower drain
Start packing to move
This doesn’t include the book I’m writing, work I have for my actual job, dinner with friends, preparation for acting class, a new play I started to write in the middle of the night one night, podcast prep and recording, and French practice I’m trying to squeeze in. A friend of mine once said to me, ”You have a lot of hobbies.” I responded that I have ADHD.
All jokes aside, I often find that I am more productive and happier when I am busy because I have a clear schedule and deadlines—it’s when I have a lot of free time on my hands that I tend to languish.
Recently, I have discovered there is a tipping point between “productive” and “busy for busy sake”. I hit that breaking point on Wednesday, and I decided to take a night off—no work, no going out, no packing (okay, I did pack underwear for France). Instead of thinking of this as “free time”, however, I decided this was “scheduled rest time.” I turned on one of my favorite French shows (sneaky French practice!), got out my cross-stitch and relaxed. I was then much more energized to take on my tasks the next day.
I also decided that some things can wait till later. Packing to move will happen when I get back from France. Everything that needed to happen for my job is done. I’ll have time to write when I’m abroad—and really, what is more inspirational than a French café?
So, I close the week being less overwhelmed than I was at the beginning of the week, recognizing what needs my energy and what, frankly, isn’t that important. It turns out…a lot isn’t that important anyway, and taking time to rest is a necessary part of a productive life.
Ten Things This Week
Like nearly everyone in LA, I am riveted by Baby Reindeer. It’s twisted and dark, and the surrounding controversy is also. wild.
I watched the French film “Le Prénom” (What’s in a Name?) a week ago, recommended by a French friend. Deliciously wonderful dark comedy. If you like “God of Carnage” or “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolfe”, you will love this.
I am currently reading “The House Keepers”, a fun historical thriller that has kept me guessing at every turn. Love some women getting their due.
In an effort to improve my French, I’ve been listening to more French musicians. I recently started listening to Pomme who is touring around the US right now. I just may go to her LA show when I get back.
Also, Eurovision is happening while I’m in France and I plan to watch the finals from a bar watch party. This is like being abroad for the World Cup only better.
I stopped at this food hall in Tulsa before I drove to Stillwater. It’s apparently one of the best food halls in the country. If you’re passing through Oklahoma, I really recommend it.
In the least sexy thing I’ve ever recommended. I’m very into compression socks these days, especially since I’m walking on my walking pad for a long time every day. They actually make cute ones now.
Normal Gossip is back with a new season, and my drives got a lot more juicy again.
I read the play “Raised in Captivity” this week after having scenes performed in acting class. It’s paradoxical throughout, and I think that’s what makes the meditation on love so captivating and an emotional roller coaster.
I head back to France tonight, after I found a very cheap plane ticket. If you have any interest in following along my ventures, I’ll be writing my blog again!
Till next time!
Melanie